chotu...ek chai....

The current “me” is a changed person. From a shy, over sensitive and under-confident person in school days, to a fairly confident, positive person in college, this has been a very valuable journey in my life. I still remember being sad over petty matters like not scoring well in my exams, losing an argument with friends or not getting a thing that I wanted. Many instances in my adolescent years have taught me better.

It was the last evening of my second semester in BITS. After a ‘not very descent’ performance in the exams (not that I regret it), I sought some relief in the rehdy in front of Shankar Bhavan(my hostel for the first year). Rehdys in Bits are more popular than the college canteens. With local varieties of delicacies(they actually are delicacies) like Sam-chat (samosa chat) and papadi chat and poha and what not, they are just everything that the students want; meeting spots for ghots(or ghosts, for folks like us) to discuss, love points for couples, and vella-panti hubs for others.

I sat on the blue bench and ordered a sam-fry. Everybody seemed happy, with exams over and the prospect of the coming holidays. Some people were already leaving the campus with their rucksacks on and cabs ready. My hostel’s rehdy was owned by an aged man in fifties. He had a small boy working for him. Everybody called him chhotu. I had seen him many a times there and he always used to greet me whenever I passed by. He was a dark, stout boy, not more than twelve years of age and had a grim face.

‘Tumhara naam kya hai?’ I asked him when he came to me with my order.

‘Vijay’, he said with a sheepish face.

‘Kitne saal ke ho tum?’ I said him with serious but polite expressions on my face.

‘unnhh....14 saheb, 14 saal ka hoon.’

I had expected that. These child-workers are well trained to answer such questions. I knew he was lying but I remained composed.

‘School jaate ho?’ I asked though I knew the answer. I could sense the rehdywala (owner) staring at me.

‘nahi sahib.’ It was the rehdywala this time.

‘kaha jayega sahab school? Agar ye school jayega to iska ghar kaise chalega?’

I gave him a questioning look. ‘Kyu, iske maa baap kya karte hai?’ I asked him.

‘Hai na saab, baap ek number ka bevda hai. Poora din padaa rehta hai., he said.

‘yeh jhoot bol raha hai na? Ye 14 saal ka nahi ho sakta.’ I tried to ask politely.

‘Nahi sahib, ye 14 saal ka hi hai.’, he curtly replied.

After a while I saw my friend coming and waved lazily to him. He sat beside me and ordered a shikanji (lemon juice) for himself. As usual he started complaining about the course and teachers and what not. I saw the boy looking towards my friend with eloquent eyes. I wondered what the boy was thinking about my friend. Probably he wished to tell him, ’my friend, I would face a thousand more problems than what you have, to lead a life like you’.

After a while, a college student with posh clothes and branded shoes stopped his cycle at the rehdy and shouted, ‘chotu, ek chai!’.

Kaash....

KAASH...

kaash tum mere dil ko samaj paate,

is chehere ke piche chupe chahat ko

kaash tum bhi dekh paate.....

yu toh khuli kitaab hai meri zindagi,

apni nazaron se kabhi ise,

kaash tum bhi padh lete.....

akeele jo hum chal pade is raah pe,

manzil milane me mujhe

kaash tum bhi mera saath dete.....

dosti to hai hum dono ke darmiyaan,

kaash is dosti ko tum pyaar mein badal paate.....

muskuraahat ke toh kai deewane hai tumhari,

us ek hansi ke kaash hum bhi haqdaar hote......

sapno me to mere tum hi ho basey,

kaash baahon mein bhi hum tumhe samaa paate.....

dil ki baat jo keh nahi paate hum tumse,

kaash tum use meri aakhon mein dekh paate.......

Chasing dreams, slowed by hurdles...

Living and chasing dreams, is the way life goes for ambitious people. I thought about this seriously for the first time after my high school, when I somehow exceeded my own expectations. I passed my Board examinations with "so called" flying colors and (though on a local level) came in the limelight of aunties and oldies who (for no reason) thought of me as someone extra-terrestrial who knew far more than those on earth. Well, they hardly knew that scoring good marks in a board exam don't mean much in this competitive "today". Well, on the positive side though, this increased my self -confidence immensely.
Well, the next two years ended up quite well with me ending up in a good engineering college, to add to the happiness of me and my family(the later part being very special to me).Now that I am in BITS-Pilani, I am dealing with an all together different crowd. My dreams are also bigger now and so are my ambitions.
Coming to the point now, we have a Music Club here in Bits-Pilani. It's the cream of our college. Only the most talented artists can make it to this club. And it's quite obvious that they are the most respected and known personalities in the college. Well, I am also kinda into Music and after watching the Music club perform in the college for the first time, I decided that I am gonna land up in there. I tried my luck in the 2nd sem but failed to reach their standards. Still, it was quite a great learning experience and it made me even more passionate and desperate in getting into the music club. I started practicing and also learned some basics of classical music (vocals) in my summer holidays back in nagpur.
Then the 3rd sem started.I had already planned and practiced the songs that I was to sing in the auditions. But special things just don't remain special if they come by easily. Just about 2-3 days before the auditions , I fell sick badly and had to be admitted to the only hospital in pilani. All my hopes got crushed when I expectantly asked the doctor about my discharge on the morning of the auditions and he smiled and said that I was too fragile to be discharged this early. That was the longest day of my life.
But as the dialogue goes, "picture abhi baki hai mere dost". Though this sickness has delayed my goal by a semester, next time it will be all the more fierce and tough from my side. The ant that had fallen midway on the hill, is ready to climb it once again, more cautiously this time.

What more, to endure

It was the midnight of 2^nd December, 1984 that proved to be a nightmare for those living in Bhopal. Around the intervening night of 2-3 December, 1984 a pesticide plant established on the outskirts of Bhopal leaked methyl isocyanate(MIC), a toxic gas was released that massacred around 20,000 people and maimed lakhs.

Around 25 years after this dreadful disaster, the government and the court have something to say for the public. All eight accused in the case have been convicted by the Bhopal High Court. It’s a shame that to convict 8 people for a case that resulted in the death of 20,000 people, it took 26 years. Even after these many years, victims are still suffering. This time it’s the worst consequences of corporate phlegm, judicial sluggishness and a society that simply failed to formulate a satisfying response to the tragedy. The charges with which the accused have been convicted with, leaves them with a crime comparable to a petty thief. People responsible for the killings of thousands of innocent people, physically impairing lakhs and fiddling with the life of millions will be sentenced to 2 years imprisonment and a fine of 50,000 rupees! Moreover, the chief criminal, CEO of Union Carbides (UCC) is still absconding!

Can we call it justice? No, it’s rather a spitting on the face of the victims. It’s like making them feel that they were fools to have believed till now that they might get justice. If only time can heal such great wounds on the hearts of the victims, even that is denied. The execution of this case is just rubbing salt into those healing wounds.

On the wee hours of 3^rd December, 1984, the victims were taken to the hospital, dead bodies were lying like autumn leaves fallen on the ground, a mother was crying beside her son’s body, people were running away from their homes with their families in confusion and in the middle of this chaos, a police loudspeaker broadcasted: “Everything is normal”! ………..Was it normal? Can it ever be?